Annoying puddles

April 22, 2011

I am not a person with too many complaints. In fact I usually live my life with the ‘If it makes you sad, move on’ mantra. However, one of the things that always has me fuming is watching people stain the roads with their bodily fluids. I don’t mean to be uncouth with this statement, but most of you will surely agree with me.

I don't believe in taking a vehicle everywhere, so usually walk short distances. And whenever I do, I can spot more number of spit marks on the ground (increasing in number as I walk) than people on the road. So bad is the situation these days that it would take a person more effort to dodge these disgusting puddles and avoid bumping into people who are publicly urinating than it would to stay clear of traffic.

As I am thoroughly disgusted, I also wonder what it would take to make these people stop. I came up with only a few ideas.

Firstly, they could be told that a higher being frowns upon them every time they dirty the streets. This higher being would of course, have to be some one along the likes of Amitabh Bachhan, since religious blackmailing rarely works these days.

Secondly, they could be told that doing such things spreads terrible diseases. I’m sure a rumour as such would do more good than harm. And if not, there could be a prompt follow-up saying that ‘after doing tests, it was found to be incorrect’.

I remember the time when Cyrus Broacha of MTV Bakra fame, would walk up to people urinating at the side of the road, and ask them 'Bhaisahib, yeh aap kya kar rahe hain??' as a part of a show. Silly as it was, it did make me smile wickedly, and think 'Serves them right!' Its a shame the show got cancelled. I assume someone out there (probably a closeted road-urinator) didn't find it quite as funny.

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